FIt is the New Fat!

For me it is, anyway. I want to get FIT. This blog might be a copycat of a lot of other books, blogs and whathaveyou, but I don’t care. It’s my accountability blog and I do what I want. And what I want is to be fit. I’ve thought a long time (oh, 18 years, ever since my mom put me on Weight Watchers at age 10 – thanks for the healthy self-image mom) about what I’d really like my ideal body to be like. And I know that I definitely don’t want it to be like a waif-thin model. I don’t think I’d look good like that. Plenty of people do, and I am not going to put down anyone whose natural body type is skinny (unless they are the type of person who likes to brag about how they eat whatever they want but never gain an ounce. I hate those people. Seriously, we don’t need to see a picture of your plate of cheeseburger and fries and a bragging comment of how you ate that and a milk shake. The only people who brag that much about what they ate are anorexics or bitches.)

Anyhow … in my internal inspiration board, my ideal body type is more athletic. I want to have muscles – not huge muscles, but I want to look strong and healthy. Like more on the personal trainer side than on the super skinny side. And I don’t want to do anything crazy to lose weight. Remember when DJ Tanner was trying to lose weight, and she put up pictures of skinny models on her refrigerator door and made ice pops that she ate which were just ice cubes with a stick through it and then that skinny bitch Kimmy Gibler threw a pool party and came over and took DJ’s cookies out of the trash bragging all the while because she sucked and then the Tanners joined a gym and DJ keeled over on the stepper because as Steph pointed out, she hadn’t eaten anything in THREE DAYS? Yeah, I don’t want to flirt with anorexia in any such manner.

I DO want to keep it interesting (more interesting than fainting in Bob Saget’s arms!) so I am going to be giving myself small challenges. I am not going to do anything unhealthy – no additives, no crazy regimes, no crazy diets – but I will incorporate new ideas and workout plans. So, for example, a bad suggestion would be “try ginseng” while a good one would be “try jogging every day.”

“Suggestions?” you ask? Yes! I will try and think of some but I also want to empower you, my reader(s) to come up with ideas! Tell me what to do each week, whether it’s a certain type of exercise, or a food I should incorporate or an eating plan! I will be like your little puppet. Your little hand puppet who is slowly losing weight and gaining muscle to become a super terrifying merrionette who will then CUT the strings and fly unfettered off the puppet stage much like in Return to Witch Mountain (only in that instance you could see the strings, so it will be like that only without strings and magical alien children.)

Whew. So if you have an idea, leave it in the comments or e-mail me directly. I will follow up with a daily log of my activities and a weekly weight loss amount. I am not going to tell you or anyone how much I weight as that is between me and my Wii Fit. I will document the number of pounds gained or lost though. I also plan on continuing my Weight Watchers meeting attendance and will happily recap those as well. Sometimes they’re funny.